Cinnamon Raisin Walnut Bread: The Gang's All Here!

And by the gang, I mean all of the gross things.  I don't like cooked raisins.  I don't really like walnuts (unless with noonandpaneer).  I like cinnamon, so we can be friends in this adventure with all the other gross things.  You might ask: "Taneem, why are you doing this then?  WTF?  Why not just skip the recipe?"  I have one answer: When I took karate for a wasted eight billion years of my life, there was a sign in the little room aka dojo.  Winners never quit, and quitters never win.  I think.  So, there.  PS: I quit karate.  Sports are for losers.

So, I'm making this bread because I am a winner!  And because people aka Brendan will eat it if I hate it.  So whatever, I like baking.  Hi.

Anyway, flour + sugar + salt + yeast + cinnamon =

This + egg + shortening + milk + water =

Stir, stir, stir!  I need to make a bread song.  It will have a lot of puns.  Like, I knead to make a bread song.  Ha!

Who's the boy you like the most?  Is he teasing you with underage?

I'm teasing you with dough.  All stirred up.  Like James Bond.  Or something.

This is what I do when it won't stir all the way in the bowl.  It's hard to incorporate everything.  Will I talk about this every week?  I guess so.  So, I incorporated it by hand.  And got a pretty dough-of-color.  Take that, racist bakers.

Why can't I keep it like this?  Just bake cinnamon bread?  Maybe I should have.  But, too late.

ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  DOUGH, WALNUTS, RAISINS, ALL FIGHTING FOR THE VICTORY, WHO WILL WIN?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You forget, in Taneem's feminist and pacifist breadbaking world, we are all friends.  Now, they realize.  And are friends.

Sit for a couple hours.  Become better friends.  Nothing like being stuck in a big red bowl together for two hours.  I might take a nap.  I always say that.

Two hours later (I did take a little nap, but I might take another one), and!:

So, in order to assist in making this bread as non-gross as possible, I'm following a little comment Peter has on the side of the recipe, involving:

Cinnamon and sugar!!  Again!  Yaay!  I don't understand why Peter puts his recipes in alphabetical order.  I mean, why not all the sweet breads, and all the sandwich ones or whatever.  Why like this?  I mean, it's kind of nice, b/c there's variety.  Except when two sweet breads land next to each other.  Or when one of the breads in cinnamon buns and you don't have any bread to eat for the week, and then the next bread is this shiz, and it's not like you can make a sandwich with this.

So, anyway, in this addendum to the recipe, you swirl.  Like last week.  Deja vu, except it turned into a nightmare b/c it involves cooked raisins.

Have to admit, with the stuff in the dough, it does look pretty.  But, then, when you're rolling the stuff up, bits and pieces of walnut and raisin fall out.

Packed up and ready to go!  Like a well-stuffed piece of luggage.

In this probably too big pan.  I realized, also, that when I let the dough rise, it's nice outside = no heat, but it's cold in here still = baby dough.  So, I put it in the oven, again, to let it rise so it doubles.  Maybe it'll crest the pan.  Whateva.  The quarter's over (save grading), and this is my reward.  And it's a gross reward.  Nap time, again!

Nap fail.  I hate nap fail.  Back to what you are all really here for.  The bread.  After about ninety minutes, it's keepin' pace.

What does keepin' pace mean?  I don't really know.  But it's a real phrase, no?  I thought it sounded apropos.  The walnuts look even grosser in this picture.  So do the raisins, like little bugs.  Don't worry, I have to eat this, not you.

For some reason, Peter says you should put the loaf/ves (because there's supposed to be two -- as always, I cut the recipe in half) on a sheet pan in the oven.  Why?  You got me.  It's the blind leading the blind here, except insert another saying that isn't so problematic.

So, here it is, on a sheet pan in the oven:

A different angle on the oven.  I know, it's cool.  So, this is in the hot seat for twenty minutes, then twenty to thirty more.

After forty minutes!

This actually looks relatively tasty.  I'm excited to see what it looks like with the "swirl" inside, at any rate.  I should have used chocolate chips instead of raisins.  Chocolate chip walnut bread I could handle. Rests here for one to two hours.

Aaaaaaand:

Ah!  What do I think?

This is surprisingly good.  I mean, really good.  For a bread with walnuts and raisins.  *Gasp* -- I think I want another piece!!!!!!!  4.5/5 stars! <3